Got nothing but links for you now. Nothing but links and not even hot ones at that, but stick around and I promise I'll find a way to feed you something more.
Living In Squalor
Living in squalor was an exaggeration of their actual living conditions but it was an accurate depiction of how he felt about them.
They were cramped, uncomfortable and awkward.
He couldn't understand why the owners failed to understand that it wasn't their wish or desire to live this way and that it was embarrassing.
The whole situation made him feel ashamed, angry and upset which is why you didn't hear him talk about it often because words didn't help.
All they did was tear the scab off of a wound that had never healed.
The pain might not be what what it once was but it wasn't gone either.
And when it was exposed it always felt as raw and awful as it did the day it happened.
They were cramped, uncomfortable and awkward.
He couldn't understand why the owners failed to understand that it wasn't their wish or desire to live this way and that it was embarrassing.
The whole situation made him feel ashamed, angry and upset which is why you didn't hear him talk about it often because words didn't help.
All they did was tear the scab off of a wound that had never healed.
The pain might not be what what it once was but it wasn't gone either.
And when it was exposed it always felt as raw and awful as it did the day it happened.
The Giant Rock
Ask me to describe my life I will tell you that right now it is a cross between fireman and rock climber.
Feels a bit like I spend my days running around with my hair on fire while I try to extinguish the larger fires that threaten to explode and burn out of control.
It is much better than it was a while back but we haven't yet reached the place when I can truly relax which is why I think of myself as a rock climber.
I keep doing all that can to climb up the mountain side except there is no safety harness and I am carrying a bunch of dead weight.
Eventually I'll get to the top, turn around and yell because I'll be relieved but in the interim I spend my time with hands and jaw clenched fighting to climb over and around the obstacles that are in my way and believe me there are many.
Need more reading material? Well try some of these:
Feels a bit like I spend my days running around with my hair on fire while I try to extinguish the larger fires that threaten to explode and burn out of control.
It is much better than it was a while back but we haven't yet reached the place when I can truly relax which is why I think of myself as a rock climber.
I keep doing all that can to climb up the mountain side except there is no safety harness and I am carrying a bunch of dead weight.
Eventually I'll get to the top, turn around and yell because I'll be relieved but in the interim I spend my time with hands and jaw clenched fighting to climb over and around the obstacles that are in my way and believe me there are many.
Need more reading material? Well try some of these:
Sleep Is Avoiding Me
Insomnia and I are not good friends. We don't have much of a relationship at all and I am grateful for that.
Most nights I am snoring before my head ever hits the pillow but there is the odd exception and today is one of those times.
I lay down, closed my eyes and prepared to enjoy some amazing dreams but shut eye refused to come so I decided not to fight it. Didn't want to count sheep when I could come put down a few words and update a blog or two.
I figured that if sleep wasn't forthcoming it had to be tied into the thoughts that are rattling around inside the giant cavern between my ears. Figured that it might help to put these thoughts down and see if that didn't take some of the edge off of it all.
And so I am here thinking hard about what I am doing, where I am living and asking myself if I made the right decision to come back. Wondering how things got to be as they are and asking myself if I ever expected any of this to happen.
The answer is I never did and yet here I am.
So I sit here and wonder what that means and how will things unfold. It is kind of strange but very exciting.
Most nights I am snoring before my head ever hits the pillow but there is the odd exception and today is one of those times.
I lay down, closed my eyes and prepared to enjoy some amazing dreams but shut eye refused to come so I decided not to fight it. Didn't want to count sheep when I could come put down a few words and update a blog or two.
I figured that if sleep wasn't forthcoming it had to be tied into the thoughts that are rattling around inside the giant cavern between my ears. Figured that it might help to put these thoughts down and see if that didn't take some of the edge off of it all.
And so I am here thinking hard about what I am doing, where I am living and asking myself if I made the right decision to come back. Wondering how things got to be as they are and asking myself if I ever expected any of this to happen.
The answer is I never did and yet here I am.
So I sit here and wonder what that means and how will things unfold. It is kind of strange but very exciting.
Reflections
This is one of those posts that might be better suited for TheJackB but I am placing it here because I feel like this one is being neglected a bit.
Here is where it all started and sometimes you have to spend a bit of time showing some respect for your elders.
Been an interesting few weeks and I find myself in an odd position where it seems like all I do is argue and or disagree with virtually everyone around me,
I am not shy or afraid to express my feelings nor do I have any problem standing alone. I am comfortable being the man who swims against the stream yet I have learned to stop what I am doing and consider if my actions are helping or hurting me.
Because if it is you against the world you need to figure out if you are arguing that the earth is round while the others say flat. If that is the case than you can keep doing what you are doing, keep going on and feel confident that your position is the right one to have.
But if you find that things are reversed you need to take a hard look and ask if your position is principled and or for lack of a better term, noble.
Because if you are the one who claims the earth is flat than maybe you are also the ass and what is the upside in insisting on fighting with everyone when you are defending idiocy.
More reading:
Here is where it all started and sometimes you have to spend a bit of time showing some respect for your elders.
Been an interesting few weeks and I find myself in an odd position where it seems like all I do is argue and or disagree with virtually everyone around me,
I am not shy or afraid to express my feelings nor do I have any problem standing alone. I am comfortable being the man who swims against the stream yet I have learned to stop what I am doing and consider if my actions are helping or hurting me.
Because if it is you against the world you need to figure out if you are arguing that the earth is round while the others say flat. If that is the case than you can keep doing what you are doing, keep going on and feel confident that your position is the right one to have.
But if you find that things are reversed you need to take a hard look and ask if your position is principled and or for lack of a better term, noble.
Because if you are the one who claims the earth is flat than maybe you are also the ass and what is the upside in insisting on fighting with everyone when you are defending idiocy.
More reading:
The Changes Come Fast and Furious
I stumbled onto a post called The Wiggles Don't Play Here Anymore and thought about all of the changes of the past few years. Will probably write a post about it in more detail at TheJackB.
It was a bittersweet read and if I had more free time I would write about it all now but alas I don't so all you get is a 3 minute shot of free thinking Jack.
Been writing like a fiend lately and all it has done is reminded me of how much time I really want and my dream of being able to do nothing but work on my writing. It makes me smile to think about that day and how I'll focus on storytelling.
And it makes me smile to think about how there have been moments where I had more time yet just couldn't spend it all at the computer.
Life is nothing but interesting, especially when you think about how sometimes it takes losing what you had to understand just why you miss it so much.
And now for those of you who want more reading material:
It was a bittersweet read and if I had more free time I would write about it all now but alas I don't so all you get is a 3 minute shot of free thinking Jack.
Been writing like a fiend lately and all it has done is reminded me of how much time I really want and my dream of being able to do nothing but work on my writing. It makes me smile to think about that day and how I'll focus on storytelling.
And it makes me smile to think about how there have been moments where I had more time yet just couldn't spend it all at the computer.
Life is nothing but interesting, especially when you think about how sometimes it takes losing what you had to understand just why you miss it so much.
And now for those of you who want more reading material:
Five Minutes
Got about five minutes to clear my head and catch my breath. Five minutes to try to figure out why I can't make the square piece fit inside the circle. Blame it on the four state traveling circus I just completed.
Old man is foggy headed and feeling a bit slower than normal, but I'll power through it because that is just how it has to be. Crazy to think that a couple days ago I was living in a very different world than I am now.
But I figure this is just one of those transitional moments people go through.
And now onto the blogs that pay me for writing.
Old man is foggy headed and feeling a bit slower than normal, but I'll power through it because that is just how it has to be. Crazy to think that a couple days ago I was living in a very different world than I am now.
But I figure this is just one of those transitional moments people go through.
And now onto the blogs that pay me for writing.
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