Someone needs to explain to some of the women in my building that dumping a bucket of perfume on themselves is not a good thing ever. And in small spaces it is really oppressive. When you start hoping that someone in the elevator has a sudden and horrible bout of flatulence you can be certain that you are wearing too much perfume.
Or should I be nice and describe the woman who was wearing a red dress that was at least 3 sizes too small. You can pretend to wear a 10, but form fitting betrays you. A woman is supposed to be curvy, but you take it to new levels.
A wonder bra is a tool designed to give you cleavage, we shouldn't wonder if the herky-jerky movements of the elevator will cause your boobs to pop out. Nor should we think to ourselves that your shoes are left over from the disco ball you hung in your home.
And as mentioned, if you are going to shower yourself in perfume take the stairs or do us all a favor and let us know in advance that prior to entering the elevator we should light a match.
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