Last week I did something that I almost never do. I ate lunch with another blogger. I gave up my anonymity. It is something that I have been reluctant to do. And aside from some very rare instances and the loutish of behavior of a few dullards my identity has remained unknown.
The decision to take off the mask and come out into the daylight was not easy. This blog has been a place in which I have shared some closely held secrets/feelings, but then again these secrets have been shared with you, the reader who often are bloggers as well. And that is what made the difference.
The blog has given all of us a chance to develop a relationship with each other and in some cases a genuine friendship has developed. So I can't say that I was surprised to find that the conversation with this other blogger was quite comfortable. It felt very similar to seeing an old friend that I hadn't seen in a while.
I left that meal with a lot to think about. Some of those thoughts may come out here and some of them are still being digested, but here is the general idea. Am I still being served by my anonymity. Is it something that is a help or a hindrance. Should I let my family and friends into my secret world. Should I invite them into my cyberspace living room or do I still limit entrance to the pseudo-secret club.
I wonder.
12 comments:
hi jack ...
along pico blvd, where did u go?
we had some fabulous meals when
there recently for the Avrech
memorial lecture.
alan
ah good questions!..I plan to meet a very select few whom I trust and have spoken to some already...makes them human!..but tread carefully my friend!
So much I wish I could say but can't because I'm not anonymous. I vote for keeping the anonymity and using your discretion for who to trust with your identity.
Oooh, oooh! Maybe I could pretend that Sheyna is my pseudonym and my real name is something totally different! Maybe? Nah...
I think there's a good neutral ground when it comes to this. It's good to stay relatively anonymous and then you can use your own judgement as to who you feel comfortable revealing more to.
I strongly advise anyone who reveals themselves in their blogs to keep it away from anyone who is a part of their life. You start thinking "What would so-and-so think of that?" and next thing you know you are censoring yourself so heavily that you lose interest in the whole thing.
Of course, if all you want to write is sanitized family news, then it's ok.
Hi Alan,
Nagila pizza.
Woman,
Treading carefully is something that I take very seriously.
Sheyna,
Discretion is the better part of valor.
Orie,
It is a fine line to walk, but a very important one.
Silk,
There is a lot of truth in what you say.
I felt the same way when meeting the Bean family a while back. Never met them before, but felt more comfortable with them than with many people that I've known for years.
It comes down to familiarity, common interests, etc. But I'd certainly use discretion when determining who to unmask to.
I never put on the cloak of anonymity. Why? I don't really care, who knows me online. We live in huge cities we bump into strangers all the time, we meet people we like, and people we dislike . I have met just as many crackpots in real life as in cyberspace and I usually introduce myself. That said, My wife got a bit concerned when I had an active dialogue with David Duke (definitely a crackpot).
...at least you took off that cloak of anonymity for a very lovely person.
um, so are you trying to tell me i shouldn't have been calling you "jack" for these past few years? ;)
But I'd certainly use discretion when determining who to unmask to.
Absolutely.
Bill,
I can appreciate why your wife might be concerned. He is a certified professional schmuck.
Pearl,
Did I ever mention that Jack and the dog have similar names. ;)
As long as you didn't disclose the secret handshake, we're still cool.
Jameel,
Never.
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