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No, You Cannot Cancel AOL

You have to love this customer service. (Audio file)

Click here and here as well.
Here is a partial transcript:

AOL REPRESENTATIVE:
Hi this is John at AOL... how may I help you today?
VINCENT FERRARI: I wanted to cancel my account.
AOL: Sorry to hear that. Let's pull your account up here real quick. Can I
have your name please?
VINCENT: Vincent Ferrari.

CLOCK READOUT - 00:30

AOL: You've had this account for a long time.
VINCENT: Yup.
AOL: Use this quite a bit. What was the cause of wanting to turn this off today?
VINCENT: I just don't use it anymore.
AOL: Do you have a high speed connection, like the DSL or cable?
VINCENT: Yup.
AOL: How long have you had that...
VINCENT: Years...
AOL: ...the high speed?
VINCENT: ...years.
AOL: Well, actually I'm showing a lot of usage on this account.
VINCENT: Yeah, a long time, a long time ago, not recently...

CLOCK READOUT - 01:47

AOL: Okay, I mean is there a problem with the software itself?
VINCENT: No. I just don't use it, I don't need it, I don't want it. I just don't need it anymore.
AOL: Okay. So when you use this... I mean, use the computer, I'm saying, is that for business or for... for school?
VINCENT: Dude, what difference does it make. I don't want the AOL account anymore. Can we please cancel it?

CLOCK READOUT - 02:21

AOL: Last year was 545, last month was 545 hours of usage...
VINCENT: I don't know how to make this any clearer, so I'm just gonna say it one last time. Cancel the account.
AOL: Well explain to me what's, why...
VINCENT: I'm not explaining anything to you. Cancel the account.
AOL: Well, what's the matter man? We're just, I'm just trying to help here.
VINCENT: You're not helping me. You're helping me...
AOL: I am trying to help.
VINCENT: Helping... listen, I called to cancel the account. Helping me would
be canceling the account. Please help me and cancel the account.
AOL: No, it wouldn't actually...
VINCENT: Cancel my account...
AOL: Turning off your account...
VINCENT: ...cancel the account...
AOL: ...would be the worst thing that...
VINCENT: ...cancel the account.

CLOCK READOUT - 03:02

AOL: Okay, cause I'm just trying to figure out...
VINCENT: Cancel the account. I don't know how to make this any clearer for you. Cancel the account. When I say cancel the account, I don't mean help me figure out how to keep it, I mean cancel the account.
AOL: Well, I'm sorry, I don't know what anybody's done to you Vincent because all I'm...
VINCENT: Will you please cancel the account.

CLOCK READOUT - 03:32

AOL: Alright, some day when you calmed down you're gonna realize that all I
was trying to do was help you... and it was actually in your best interest to listen to me.
VINCENT: Wonderful, Okay.

CLOCK READOUT - 03:39

Comments

cruisin-mom said…
I just went through this last night, when cancelling my mother's account for her. When the AOL guy started to ask me the same questions, I told him that he had better not take me down the same road as the man who is getting so much publicity about his AOL call...he backed off, and cancelled the account!
I had a similar experience with the Ancestry.com people (I had signed up for a trial membership because I was poking around trying to find out some stuff about my mom's family). They make it nearly impossible to cancel (I don't like anyone who won't let you cancel online and makes you call so you have to listen to their reps try to talk you out of it).

I let two questions go by and snapped "Cancel this account right now. It's not up for debate."

And they did.
Anonymous said…
It's sort of like trying to cancel your health club membership. They make it really difficult.
This same thing happened to me 2 days ago with AOL... 30 minutes later I hung up on the guy and just threatened to get an attorny!

The sad thing is I am (with deepest regret) on a year contract with them. Used 7 of the of the 12 months and spent most of that time trying to log on (still within the world of dial up) and the other half getting disconnected from AOLs phone system. The moment I call and say I want to cancle my account, my phone call gets disconnected... I finally get thru and this man kept telling me what they could do for me... and I told him I WOULDN'T TAKE AOL IF YOU GAVE ME 5 YEARS FOR FREE, that still didn't detur his effort.

I would Never ever recommend anyone deal with AOL... ever. They are kind of like the Hotel California, you can check in, but never check out... as they keep dipping into your bank account!!

Anyway thank you for sharing your story, and allowing me to share mine!!

Lisa
AKA misslisa43
Lady-Light said…
My husband writes about the hi-tech industry. His name for AOL is "A-O-HELL".
Jack Steiner said…
It really is ridiculous.
Anonymous said…
My brother passed away last year and it took me a half hour to cancel his account....they tried to convince me to keep it open...I kept telling them he didn't have any family, etc...and there service just wasn't that good that he could continue to use it, being dead and all. they tried to convince me to use it....even though I already had an aol account. Argh! They even offered to give him one month free service. He is dead!! What a deal!!
Mark Day said…
And now, the inevitable parody video

Cancel my Playboy account

www.youtube.com/watch?v=TbjUnz64ywc