More Fun with Telemarketers

A short while ago I received a telephone call from a telemarketer who was pushing a trial subscription to the local newspaper. Telemarketers, bless their little hearts are so much fun to play with. I just can't help myself.

Here is a short summary of how this telephone call played out.

Telemarketer: Sir, I'd like to offer you a free trial subscription to the Blankety Blank Press.
Jack: Did you say free?

Telemarketer: Yes, I did. It doesn't cost a thing and there is no catch.
Jack: No catch? Does that mean that I don't get a special prize like a toaster or gift certificate for accepting this?

Telemarketer: No sir, you do not.
Jack: Ok, sign me up.

Telemarketer: Can you please tell me your name?
Jack: George Bush.

Telemarketer: Really, like the guy who is president.
Jack: No, I am better looking.

Telemarketer: Does having the same name as the president ever cause you any trouble?
Jack: Only when I get his mail. Dealing with the Secret Service is a bitch.

: The Secret Service? How do you get involved with them?
Jack: The Secret Service. I can't tell you, it is a secret.

Telemarketer: Really?
Jack: Do you have clearance or any sort of government privileges?

Telemarketer: How do you get those?
Jack: Sir, I don't think that your job provides that for you nor do I think that has anything to do with my free trial subscription.

Telemarketer: You are right, but I have to ask you. What is it like getting the president's mail?
Jack: Well, it is dull. He gets letters about free credit cards, notes about missing kids, coupons for local restaurants and a ton of letters offering a better mortgage.

Telemarketer: Wow, sounds just like my mail.
Jack: Yep.

Telemarketer: Ok, I appreciate your time. You, George Bush have a two week subscription to the Blankety Blank Press.
Jack: Thank you, I appreciate it.

Telemarketer: Have a good day.
Jack: You too.

It is good to know that this guy is not a doctor or a pilot. Oy vey, can you imagine.


Tamara said...

Ha Ha, you crack me up with those!

... Is the Window to Our Soul said...

Wow...there is a reason why he has his job.

Brooke said...

Too funny!

Unknown said...

I think you have just given me an idea

Anonymous said...

Oh man, I wish I had your wit. It would really come in handy when those bozos call.

When we do get a telemarketer call, my hubby simply puts the phone down and leaves the room. The telemarketer usually catches on pretty quickly.

Jack Steiner said...


Life is full of funny moments.


Yes, he is a real member of Mensa.




I hope that it works out.


You know that Bozo is from cleveland.

Rebecca said...

there's a few commercials out for Jet blue where a guy going on vacation calls up asking questions, it reminds me of you.
In one of them he says he is going to Bermuda and he doesn't want to offend anyone, what's the common practice, does he have to wear bermuda shorts?

Datingmaster, Jerusalem said...

Hey believe it or not I used to be a telemarketer and I think you harased the poor guy-he sis just trying to earn aliving.

JJ said...

Oh, good one! You had me LOL'ing there, George!

have popcorn will lurk said...

Have you ever seen this?? You can even click on a Hebrew version!! it's a riot...

Jack Steiner said...


I haven't seen those- I'll have to keep an eye out.


Your command of English comes and goes. It is rather curious.


Thank you.


I liked that.

Rebecca said...

they're radio commercials. so, keep your ears open :)

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