If I were a superhero I would need an archnemesis, a supervillain that I could fight. Because what good is a hero if there is no one to opppose him. That is no fun, that is not interesting.
My problem is that my archnemesis knows everything about me, how I think, how I move, my favorites. No one knows me better than this dude and because of his amazing insight he always is a problem.
And that problem is me. I am my own worst enemy. I have an overactive mind that absorbs and retains too much criticism. I am not good at letting things go. When bad or frustrating things happen they linger and the institutional memory of such events crops up at inopportune times and places.
Life is cyclical and so my internal battles with my own inner demons have had their ups and downs. But right now I am feeling beat up. I am searching for the edge of the clouds. I am looking for daylight and right now all I see is darkness.
From past history I know that this will change and that things will get better. But at the moment that offers little to no solace.
I am my own worst enemy.
4 comments:
You seem like a very nice man. Be happy. Here is a cyberhug.
Hang in there big boy. We'll help you.
oh i could have written this, i am with you. it's not a great place to be. I hope in 2011 you are well and that this post has been a thing of the past. god speed.
Wrote something very similar to this tonight. This blog really hit home for me. I think many of us do not realize the only thing stopping us from internal happiness and success is ourselves. We are our own worst enemy.
Post a Comment