I like To Debate, Or Should I Say Argue

Longtime friends, acquaintances, family and colleagues will all tell you that I enjoy a good conversation. I mean debate, I mean argument. Or maybe I mean all of the above.

I just like digging into the meat of a discussion and pulling it apart. It is one of those traits that can be viewed as a positive or a negative. Most of the time it all depends on which side of the fence you are standing on. If you are in agreement with me it is positive, but if you disagree it can be viewed as a huge negative.

Or should I admit that I have been told more than once that it is not endearing and that it is ok to give in. Ok, I admit it. I don't like apologizing and I don't like being wrong. The beauty of getting older is that it is much easier to admit that I am wrong, but still challenge to offer an apology. Usually you'll get "you were right, I was wrong" but don't expect the "I am sorry" to go with it.

I am working on it, but it is a long and arduous task trying to convince me to do something, even when I am the one trying to do the convincing.

One of the things that I have noticed about myself is that I am beginning to grow tired of these debates far sooner than I used to. It may be a symptom of being relatively busy and more possessive of my time, but there is no doubt that I am losing interest quickly.

But it is also indicative of the quality of these discussions. Far too often I find myself reading the position of the other side and shaking my head because it is just foolishness. Not just because I disagree, but because there is no substance and just emotion propping them up.

I'd write more about this but it is lunch time and I have to finish debating whether the Red Sox have a shot at repeating this year. See you later.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

jack - I think I may be you in a female incarnation

rabbi neil fleischmann said...

The rabbis list (in the first chapter of Avot,) the seven traits of a wise person. They all relate to how one discusses things. Check it out.

I was once on my way to an argument and was told by a friend that I was bound to lose. He said no-one wins arguments, only in a discussion can you come out ahead...

Jack Steiner said...

Sanora,

I am very happy being a man. ;)

Rav,

I'll take a look at that.

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