Changes in life

I like to think of myself as being very flexible, but I know that I am fooling myself. I am not big on change, never have been. I don't have a real good explanation for it. I can't think of a particular time or thing that affected me. I can't think of some life altering event that made me hate it, I just know that I find it to be difficult.

For that matter, I don't really enjoy saying goodbye. Sometimes I never say it, I just slip out the door.

But the point of this post is more my thoughts/exploration on change. I am not real sure what it is about change, but I get a little anxious, even when I know that it is an improvement. So I have been working on achieving a balance and accepting change more easily.

I think that what bothers me most is the anticipation. It is like the first day of school. What is it going to be like, will I like my teacher, will I have any friends, will I ever stop asking questions. And the answer to that question is why would I ever think that I'll stop asking questions or testing the limits. Don't I realize that I answer my own questions with questions.

So my strategy for dealing with change has been to break it up into bite size pieces so that I can digest it more easily.

And for what it is worth here is a list of things I change easily and frequently:

Shirts, shoes, underwear, pants, socks, toothpaste, trashbags, soda cans, silverware, table cloths, cars, music, books and food.

See, I am not a total stick in the mud.