If you haven't figured it out by now I am very much a A Sentimental Old Fool. In an earlier post I touched upon some of the feelings I have watching my son grow up. Before I continue on that I have to take care of some business.
Eventually I expect that my children will see these entries and learn a little bit more about their father and what made him tick. I want my daughter to know that she is always on my mind and in my thoughts, but she is still young enough for me to pretend that she'll stay a toddler forever.
I remember quite well how nervous I was about my son starting preschool. He was a little apprehensive too. In the beginning the drop-offs were hard. He didn't want to stay by himself and he would scream. The smile that just a moment before was replaced by a look that just tore me up and accompanied by a yell that made my heart ache.
It wasn't as bad as when he had to have tubes placed in his ears. When the nurse carried him out the look on his face was a mixture of fear and betrayal. That one stuck with me for a while.
No, these screams as he started his school career were bad, but not nearly as traumatic. His teachers said that these little bouts were very short and that they usually ended moments after he was left. But it wasn't easy to walk away, but it had to be done because part of being a good parent is helping your children learn to take care of themselves.
Gradually the drop-off turned into a painless process. It wasn't long before he barely noticed that his parents had been there. There were friends and toys to play with. A quick hug and a kiss and he was off.
Now the end of preschool has arrived and we are back to new beginnings. It is an exciting time for everyone. During the past week he has conducted his own countdown to kindergarten. Today is the last full day of school. He'll have a half day tomorrow and then we'll wrap it all up with graduation.
I think that part of the reason I feel this way is because we met many of his current classmates in mommy and me classes. I watched these children grow. I saw some of them go from crawling to walking and witnessed so much development.
Their parents and I shared stories about our kids, attended birthday parties together and just enjoyed watching the little ones play and learn together.
And now we'll watch as the class divides and people start to go their separate ways. It is ok. It is normal and it is part of growing up, I guess that what I didn't realize is that while he was growing up so was I.