"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'."
— Groucho Marx
LOL! One of my sons at five years old had this conversation with my Dad; "Zaidy, are going to die?" "Well, yes. Everyone dies eventually." "Okay. When you die can I bury you in the garden?"
Oy..he's gotten to THAT stage! Evan has it all planned out for us...we're going to die and he'll inherit the house. He even has rides to his doctor's appointments all worked out...in case he isn't driving yet!!!
Jack: I find the "LOL's" in the comments, interesting. I wonder if this was a LOL moment for you. I remember when my oldest son first starting talking about death. It was very serious for me, because my father had died when I was 10. It's interesting to see different reactions to this subject.
I personally don't find death to be anything to laugh at, nor did I find this post to be amusing. I mean, when I read it -- it struck me that Jack's son was concerned with his daddy dying. And as a mother, that concerns me.
But I am not begrudging anyone else their opinion. We all read things different ways. And I can understand how it would be heavy to do your kind of work.
Jameel, Stacey, (and, oh yeah, Jack): I have experienced my fair share of grief. I think that humor is a wonderful tool in dealing with death, dying, and grief. (I even wrote a crazy post about this very subject). It's just that I, as Stacey did, found this to be a real concern for Jack's son. Nothing more, nothing less. I am not offended by the comments containing "lol"...just saw it differently, and was wondering how Jack was seeing it.
I think this is one of those conversations that is hard to know how to judge without context -- if people close to him had died recently, then I understand how it would be a sad conversation...
but with all the cartoon and video game violence out there for entertainment, most 5-year-olds don't understand that "death" isn't something you don't come back from when you hit rewind - so there's humor to it too. I think there's a risk in taking it too seriously - you can increase a child's fears before he has a need to worry about them.
Maybe I was reading the whole thing wrong, but I think if Jack was worried about it, he'd have posted the conversation differently. Unless he died halfway through typing it.
Kids always surprise and amuse us with their honesty about subjects that we adults just avoid discussing. I was probably about Little Jack's age when I made a get well card for my grandpa that read, "I'm glad you didn't die." My mother gasped and declared it unfit for delivery, but my father howled with laughter and said my grandpa would love it. At the time, I didn't see what was so inappropriate and/or funny; it was a sincere sentiment. :-)
Not bad. I'll have to send those guys a bill for using my blog to reach prospective customers. You know that this blog is very effective at reaching the target demographic you want to be in front of.
Write me and we can establish an effective ad plan.
Randi,
I did smile. This was not a conversation where he truly was afraid of me dying. I had that one here.
Stace,
In this particular instance I don't think that he was nervous. It was a very light conversation and I followed his lead.
BF,
Love the avatar.
FS,
I think that it was along those lines.
Sometimes these conversations are serious and sometimes they are rather light.
My husband has a story that when he was a little boy around 6 yrs old, his great uncle asked him if when he gets married (my husband), can the uncle go to his wedding.
My husband looked up at him and said "if you are still alive."
19 comments:
LOL!
One of my sons at five years old had this conversation with my Dad;
"Zaidy, are going to die?"
"Well, yes. Everyone dies eventually."
"Okay. When you die can I bury you in the garden?"
oy! but LOL :P
As Art Linkletter used to say:
"Kids say the 'darndest things!'
:)I remain,
Very Sincerely yours,
Alan D. Busch
Oy..he's gotten to THAT stage! Evan has it all planned out for us...we're going to die and he'll inherit the house. He even has rides to his doctor's appointments all worked out...in case he isn't driving yet!!!
That would make a nice Hallmark card.
or maybe an advertisement for jetskis.
Kasamba,
That sounds like a pretty good deal. Elvis was buried in the backyard, the garden just might be a step up.
Sarah,
Yep. :)
Alan,
They are fun aren't they.
Z,
It sounds like Evan has been speaking with my son.
SI,
That it would.
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Son: "Dad, why doesn't grandpa work?"
Me: "He is retired now."
Son:"Are you going to work for a long time?"
Me: "I'll probably work until you are an adult."
announcer: At Prudential Mutual, we try to think of everything...
Son: "You might not.
Me: "Why?"
announcer: ...even the unexpected
Son: "Because you might die."
announcer: May you live to 120...but if you don't, there's always Prudential Mutual...becuase you could die tomorrow...
Prudential Mutual: A Proud sponser of the Jack Shack Blog
Jack: I find the "LOL's" in the comments, interesting. I wonder if this was a LOL moment for you. I remember when my oldest son first starting talking about death. It was very serious for me, because my father had died when I was 10. It's interesting to see different reactions to this subject.
Ditto, CM. I read this and didn't find it funny. I found it sad. Death/Losing you is obviously on his mind.
lol. Funny conversation and some of the comments here are great. I love the prudential commercial.
Stacey: I see death (unfortunately) alot, as a volunteer MDA EMT.
Being able to laugh a bit about it is very healthy...and it keeps us sane.
Jameel,
I personally don't find death to be anything to laugh at, nor did I find this post to be amusing. I mean, when I read it -- it struck me that Jack's son was concerned with his daddy dying. And as a mother, that concerns me.
But I am not begrudging anyone else their opinion. We all read things different ways. And I can understand how it would be heavy to do your kind of work.
Jameel, Stacey, (and, oh yeah, Jack): I have experienced my fair share of grief. I think that humor is a wonderful tool in dealing with death, dying, and grief. (I even wrote a crazy post about this very subject).
It's just that I, as Stacey did, found this to be a real concern for Jack's son. Nothing more, nothing less. I am not offended by the comments containing "lol"...just saw it differently, and was wondering how Jack was seeing it.
I think this is one of those conversations that is hard to know how to judge without context -- if people close to him had died recently, then I understand how it would be a sad conversation...
but with all the cartoon and video game violence out there for entertainment, most 5-year-olds don't understand that "death" isn't something you don't come back from when you hit rewind - so there's humor to it too. I think there's a risk in taking it too seriously - you can increase a child's fears before he has a need to worry about them.
Maybe I was reading the whole thing wrong, but I think if Jack was worried about it, he'd have posted the conversation differently. Unless he died halfway through typing it.
kidding! don't kill me!
Kids always surprise and amuse us with their honesty about subjects that we adults just avoid discussing. I was probably about Little Jack's age when I made a get well card for my grandpa that read, "I'm glad you didn't die." My mother gasped and declared it unfit for delivery, but my father howled with laughter and said my grandpa would love it. At the time, I didn't see what was so inappropriate and/or funny; it was a sincere sentiment. :-)
I'm with Stacey - I cringed. It's kinda funny, but a bit too morbid...
But if you can laugh at it, good for you.
Jameel,
Not bad. I'll have to send those guys a bill for using my blog to reach prospective customers. You know that this blog is very effective at reaching the target demographic you want to be in front of.
Write me and we can establish an effective ad plan.
Randi,
I did smile. This was not a conversation where he truly was afraid of me dying. I had that one here.
Stace,
In this particular instance I don't think that he was nervous. It was a very light conversation and I followed his lead.
BF,
Love the avatar.
FS,
I think that it was along those lines.
Sometimes these conversations are serious and sometimes they are rather light.
My husband has a story that when he was a little boy around 6 yrs old, his great uncle asked him if when he gets married (my husband), can the uncle go to his wedding.
My husband looked up at him and said "if you are still alive."
He had no idea why everyone was laughing.
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