January 13, 2009

Just A Few Thoughts About Things

I became a fan of 24 last season. Liked it enough that I decided to watch all of the prior episodes via Netflix. I did the same thing with Battlestar Galactica. Now I walk around shouting Frack this, Frack that and Frack you. In between I find myself looking at people and saying "that is not the right move."

Got to love Bauer with his "that is not the right move." Sometimes while the Shmata Queen and I are talking via telephone I say "copy that." And every now and then when my kids go to bed I sometimes look at them and say, "Goodnight Johnboy." They haven't a clue why I do that. Once they asked me why and I suggested they find a place where everybody knows their name. It is narishkeit, but it is my narishkeit.

Speaking of Cheers if I had to pick a character on that show to emulate I don't think that I could do it. Wouldn't want to be Woody, or Sam. Can't be Diane and if I was Cliff I'd have to scream. Ok, maybe I'd be Norm. I don't look a bit like him, but what the hell if you are going to force me to give you an answer.

A man recently came up to me and said, "Do I know you?" I looked at him and told him that if he took out his wallet he'd probably find some identification. He scrunched up his face and said that wasn't what he asked. I told him that Alzheimers is hitting earlier and earlier these days. And then I started screaming. Didn't do it for any particular reason. Ok, that is not true, I wanted my own seat on the bus.

Ok that last line wasn't true either, I live in L.A. Nobody takes the bus here. Ok, that is not true either, but I haven't been on a city bus since they called it the RTD.

Wading through all of the crap that people fling at me courtesy of the war is a bit draining at times. It is hard to fall into all of that muck and stay sane. Ok, maybe sane is the wrong word. What I really should say is that it is a bit depressing and disconcerting. Let's review some of what I have learned about myself courtesy of the commenters.

I am a unhinged, genocidal lunatic with a belief in a fake god and illusions of grandeur. Because of this I am doomed to go to hell and I should know that God will strike me down.

Of course I also have found out that even though I am part of this mighty cabal that runs governments and controls the world's economy there are limits to my power.

Kind of funny to think about the contradiction. We run the media. We run the world economy and yet we can't just wave a wand and make eliminate negative press. Nor can we snap our fingers and make Hamas disappear. Funny, that.

If you ask me the solution for Israel is to find our modern day hero. We don't need a King David or a Samson. All we need is the Zohan. And wouldn't that be nifty.


benning said...

Jack, if you are part of that all-powerful Jewish Cabal I keep hearing about, could you ask one of your friends in the publishing or motion picture industry to read my book? Might make a good film or sell a lot of copies.

If you're just a regular jewish-American person, then ... well, never mind. ;)

Is it PC to hope Hamas eats bloody sand for eternity? Or is that just too much to ask?

Tzipporah said...

hey Jack, could you please look into why we didn't get our monthly check from the Zionist Conspiracy this month? Is it all going to the war and the negative publicity, to prop up the illusion that we don't control anything?


Jack said...


Sure. I'll telephone the chief and tell him to give you a big signing bonus.


The cheap bastards stiffed us this month. ;)